No one understands me.
I’ll admit, it already seems like a cliche, but please hear me out.
My brain sometimes feels like a zoo of whimsical creatures, and sometimes like a library of all the books in the world, but the sad truth is that most of my thoughts will never be as recognizable as a centaur or as real as a book. Actually, most of my thoughts will never see the light of day. I feel like I have some really profound thoughts bouncing around in my head, but not the tools to communicate them. Some ideas can only be expressed by a master of words or paints or whatever medium he or she wields. Others can’t fully be expressed by anyone at all, unless the person you are talking to understands completely already.
However, I am beginning to realize that the biggest enemy of the realization of my thoughts, plans, dreams, etc., is not my inability to express them. No, the real enemy is my unwillingness to express them. If I never even try to let you in on the secrets in my mind, I don’t have the chance to either fail or succeed. And everyone hates hesitation; when someone says, “Oh, and I was going to tell you- ah, never mind.”
But I’m not just talking about writing here, or even art in general. I feel like this, as though my wondrous ideas and fantasies will never be realized, even when I go about my normal everyday routines. When I simply open my mouth to say, “Hello,” I’m afraid someone will misinterpret my motives, implications, or what my facial expression means.
There is no solution, short of mental telepathy, that can unravel this riddle. The best I, or anyone, can do try as hard as possible to express my thoughts, and even if they are misinterpreted, at least I tried.
Who knows? Maybe some new ideas will sprout out of my own (improperly?) expressed idea.